Being Both Brutal and Wrong
In the appendix of my new book I have a small list of keys for divination, the first two of which are: It’s Better To be Wrong Than Vague and Be Brutal. An astute reviewer who did not particularly like the new book (he hasn’t liked any of my books since the first one, but keeps buying them anyway) took objection to these and felt that it was a dangerous combination. ” Some people seeking advice from diviners and fortune tellers are in a fragile place and being brutal and wrong is a dangerous combination that could lead the querent to do something they otherwise wouldn’t have.”
I would counter that unless you are walking into Madame Marie’s on the boardwalk for some shits and giggles, that the whole purpose for getting a consultation is so that you get advice to do something you otherwise might not do. Otherwise why bother?
But I get it, at first glance this seems like an odd combination. Imagine somebody giving you brutal advice, that also happens to be wrong! It’s like the first 40 minutes of an episode of House MD! In fact, there is a scene from the first season of House that sums this up well:
“You took a chance, you did something great. You were wrong, but it was still great. You should feel great that it was great. You should feel like crap that it was wrong. That’s the difference between him and me. He thinks you do your job, and what will be will be. I think that what I do and what you do matters. He sleeps better at night. He shouldn’t.”
It’s not OK to be wrong, and I didn’t say it was. I said its better than being vague. Vague readings don’t help anyone but the reader who gets to look back after the fact and say “That’s what that meant!” Its a neat parlor trick that might impress people who fall for it, but its not actionable intelligence. So I say, better to be wrong than vague. Lot’s of people are wrong: Lawyers get things wrong, Corporate consultants get things wrong, Meterologists get things wrong, and if you have ever seen an episode of House you know doctors can get things wrong. It’s not ok to be wrong, but it’s better than being vague and wishy washy so that no one actually acts on your advice.
But what about brutal? Why be brutal? I am not suggesting you be an arrogant jerk about things, just truthful. If you see it, say it. You can be very nice in fact, but if your friend comes to you for a reading about his marriage, and you see that things are looking grim, don’t sugar coat it or re-interpret it to say something it doesn’t. Say what you see. That is what I mean by being Brutal: Say What You See.
Your clients should be reminded that you can be wrong, and you have been wrong. If your personal advice is different from the cards (or whatever) then you can say that too, but if you are reading for someone and the cards are saying something, then say it. Even if you might be wrong. Even if might be uncomfortable. Otherwise, what the hell are you really doing?
