The Delicate Balance Between Self Acceptance and Drive for Change.

**** This originally was for my Strategic Sorcery Student Group, but at their prompting I am posting it here for a wider audience.***

I have been exercising a lot more this summer than I ever have. Apart from the uphill hikes, I have been swimming, doing some light weights at home, etc. I have also been eating more vegetables and taking Athletic Greens supplement in the morning.

This has all made a HUGE difference in my energy levels, focus, and attitude. BUT….

I have actually gained 2 pounds since the beginning of summer.

This is not surprising. Some of it might be muscle weight, but lets be real here… The problem with Vermont is that it has all this beauty and outdoor activity BUT it also has some of the freshest and best food you have ever eaten.

You get back from a four hour hike up a mountain and someone is practically there at the bottom saying “Congratulations on your hike! Would you like some, unpasteurized blue cheese? 94 month aged cheddar? Duck egg omelet? Fancy Maple Syrup collected only in the first week of the season? Maybe wash it down with some home-made Sarsaparilla?”

Yes, yes I would.

I am all set to get back on my better eating habits after Labor Day. The reason I am writing this here Strategerati is to show that sometimes results do not always look like what you think they will. I am stronger, healthier, and feeling better than I have in years. Much more then when I would diet at home. Getting the diet component down is easier for me than the excercise component, so this has been a huge breakthrough for me. The weight loss is actually secondary (but still important) goal.

The other, more important reason I am writing this is to show the blend of self-acceptance yet desire for change that I think people should cultivate.

People seem to fall into extremes very easily about a lot of things, but keeping with the example of being overweight people tend to fall into error on two sides:

The first is feeling ashamed, needing to hide or cover up, never feeling attractive as they are.

The second is feeling that there is nothing at all wrong with their body or health and that they are fine as they are.

Both of these are, IMHO, wrong.

I think its healthy to cultivate a combination of feeling good about who you are and where you are at, while at the same time desiring to improve your situation.

I feel attractive as I am, I have no problem taking off my shirt at the beach, yet I the reality is that there are a host of health problems connected with being overweight. As one friend said to me “Jason, there are a lot of old guys, and there are a lot of fat guys, there are not a lot of old fat guys…”

I know that this is even more an issue for women, and I hope more will take a cue from people like Loey Lane who looks fucking great in a bikini. She would look great in a bikini if she was heavier still.

The point I am trying to articulate is this:

1. Pride and acceptance of who you are at this moment, should not come at the expense of a drive to better yourself.

2. The impetus to create a better you should not come at the expense of pride and acceptance of who you are right now.

It all comes back to trajectory. There is no stasis.

IN MONEY – As long as you are taking steps to handle your shit, you should feel good about where you are at, but still be working towards improving your situation.

IN LOVE – You should feel ok about being alone, married, single or whatever, but that does not mean you should not be working towards whatever your ideal situation is.

IN SPIRITUALITY – You should feel good about what you have accomplished and the clarity you possess, even though you are not a Buddha or Christ or Merlin. But you should always be moving towards something.